When most of us think of abusive relationships, we generally think of a man hitting a woman. Let’s say a couple gets into a huge fight and the boyfriend completely flips out, throws objects, punches walls, and hits his girlfriend.

Well you know what? That’s pretty cliche. Yeah, I said it. It’s the stereotypical abusive relationship with the dominant man belittling the woman in hopes of her bowing down to him while he stands tall with power and control in his hands.

I guarantee that you or someone you know has been a victim of an abusive relationship. I say this because abuse is not just physical. Abuse is constructed my humiliation, manipulation, and control. 

As most of my readers know, I am in my early twenties. I deal with so much talk about relationships it’s almost overwhelming, and I’ve heard incredible stories about fights and disputes that still shock me to this day. I always ask the people that express their concern about their relationships with me, “why haven’t you left yet?” Their responses tend to be somewhere along the lines of the other person being wrapped around their finger.

When most people hear about these relationships they think they’re just plain stupid.

Sometimes they are.

But when a person has the ability to manipulate someone to the point of abuse, it’s not stupidity, it’s control. If a person can cut down the dignity of their boyfriend or girlfriend so they have the pleasure of this animalistic, king of the jungle behavior, sometimes there’s no turning back.

Victims catch the bait. They’re reeled in, and eaten alive while everyone else can watch the humiliation and torment. How disgusting.

We need to stop this abuse. We need to spread the word about what abuse really is, and to tell people that this isn’t a way to live. To all victims of abuse: you can get out and you will. Understand that it is never okay to be isolated by a relationship. It is never okay to feel the emotional stress, possessiveness, and intimidation. Never act a certain way to please others. All that matters is that you are happy. No one can judge your happiness other than yourself.


[Learn more about abuse by visiting http://www.loveisrespect.org. There are live chats 24/7 as well as a hotline 866-331-9474.]